My soon to graduate student, Sniffpus:

 

In the midst of the mundane task of grading final exams for the upcoming commencement ceremonies I found this rather interesting statement from you regarding the current political state in the world:

 

    "One would think that these vermin are in the throes of a long and extended LSD trip when one observes how distinctly out of touch with reality they are."

 

I am pleased that you have made the connection between the illicit use of drugs and the removal of any remnant sanity from these beasts. It was, in fact, part of our master plan to use the intoxication of the mind as a doorway to the soul. LSD was the prime ingredient in our initial possession of a vast number of moonbats who now hold offices of high position in world governments, but just about any drug will do the trick. LSD simply got the job done a lot quicker for us.

 

As one example of this walking lunacy into which we have lulled the human beings, I would direct your attention to the useful idiot we have currently occupying the White House. My old friend (I use that term most loosely, since there is no such thing as real friendship in the Lowerworld. Remember my instruction to always watch your back!) Snotglomulous has set up permanent housekeeping in the temple of this wretched fool’s soul, and so completely owns and runs him that this character, who in his ego fancies himself to be the “leader of the free world,” is nothing more than a puppet for the desires of hell and our long term plans. I have been over to visit a couple of times, and over a nice, hot Hellfire Lager we have relived with glee the manner in which Snotty took over this fool and the plans for his future, which involve deceiving a great number of souls into hell because he is a “man of color” and therefore to be listened to. When we were in imp school together I thought even then that Snotty (as we used to call him, much to his displeasure) showed a great deal of promise as a tempter. He has certainly lived up to every expectation old Professor Goatdung had in him. Possession of the leader of a major country is no small accomplishment, especially one in which the Enemy's Book is known and read. It has been the drug-infested orgies of the 1960's which have made our work considerably easier. Better living through chemistry, don’t you know.

 

Snotty has this deluded politician thinking that every idea he gets to advance the cause of deviant sexuality and moral breakdown comes from himself. Snotty has used his pride - my hell, it is the size of a dirigible and getting bigger every day -to convince him that he has the most intelligent mind among all mankind. Barrack doesn't even realize that it is the whisperings of hell suggesting to him that wickedness is acceptable behavior which is to be protected. Add to such delightful pride a large dash of misbegotten sympathy for the whining of people demanding their perverse erotic desires be catered to and normalized by government officials and there you have success. Long after this ignoramous - who by himself hasn't the mental capacity to pick cotton on a plantation - has died and is in our grasp, we will be reaping souls by the busload for all the work he has done to convince the ignorant that perversity is normal. 

 

The principle I wish to discuss with you is twofold: the use of various means by which you can open the door of a man's soul to your possession, and the patience required to properly accomplish this. At no other time in the world have the concepts of reason and discernable truth have been so twisted. They have been slowly eroded over the last five decades, being replaced by sentimentality and a flexible standard of right and wrong. We have dug this hole so deep that the few rational human beings who are left in the world (our Enemy’s soldiers) cannot even appeal to something as strong as natural law to prove the existence of states of being. To explain that male and female are made in a complimentary manner and are fitted in such a was as to come together and produce life is a fact which any moron with half a brain should be able to recognize as truth. The Enemy has made this reality very clear in the design and function of the human body, yet these geniuses deny this and instead mewl and carry on about how wrong it is if two men love each other that they cannot get married, as if marriage could ever be between two men (or two women, or a tree and a cat). None of this took place overnight - so here is my final lesson to you. You are one of a few in this graduating class who shows promise to become more than a drone for our Dread Master. Apply these principles and they will serve you well in the coming centuries.

 

1. Open the door to a human soul with behaviors that first turn your subject away from Enemy. Remember, that while the Enemy is love (ugh....how I hate using that word!) and ever looks for his little vermin to come to Him, there are certain items, such as ouija boards, false religious prayers, and drugs, which will slowly turn them away from Him. Get your subject to use them and you open in them a direct link to our world. A prayer to the Hindu "god" Ganesh is an open invitation to the Underworld. The same is true of your heavier drugs like LSD. That brainless halfwit, Timothy Leary, was one of our best soldiers in bringing us droves of souls who followed him into the delusion of using LSD as a way to contact the Enemy. What these hippie fools contacted was legions of demons, hungry for souls and waiting for the doors to open to them. The 1960's was a banquet of possession for the Lowerworld, and we are feasting even today on souls who were shocked when the pretty kaleidoscope of colors turned hellfire red on them.

 

2.  Once you have opened the door a crack, the next thing you want to do is to bit by bit gently ease your self into the soul - gently, dammit! do not startle it! - and it is yours! When a door has opened, you do not go rushing into a soul eagerly looking for a place to set up camp, throwing around great sinful ideas. I guarantee you, the soul will feel it and you will have problems to deal with, especially if the human has had any prior contact with the Enemy's religion. Generally speaking, when the doorway to a soul opens, it only opens but a bit, and you must work with that small invitation to make it a full and wide point of entry. It is at the first point of entry that you must observe your subject and find out where his emotions lie. By using the emotions, you will be able to gain entry. The feelings and passions of the humans are a great ally for us in our warfare.

 

3.  A list of human actions which will give you an initial opening: 

 

Ouiji Boards, tarot cards, going to fortune tellers, divination, dowsing for water, and witchcraft.

 

Drugs of all kinds, especially the mind-altering ones like peyote and LSD.

 

Pornography (You wouldn't believe how effective this has been. Take a weekend to observe the actions of a porno addict and you will understand.)

 

False religious worship, which gives honor to our Dark Underlord.  Pagan idol worship is especially effective. Heretical Christian worship not so much because of their baptism in the name of the Trinity.

 

Bizarre sexual practices, both within and outside the normal realm of sex within marriage.

 

Communism, Socialism, Freemasonary, and secret societies.

 

There are other sins which draw humans from the Enemy, but these are the prime acts which grant us unfettered access to their souls. Learn this list, observe your subject carefully, and use the appropriate tool at the right time.

 

4. As an example, if you find upon your first examination, that your subject is possessed of a finely tuned sense of guilt, then use that guilt against him. Suggest that the guilt is false and that it is the Law of our Enemy which must change. Suggest that the Enemy's Book is an old antique which is not up with the times, and that he is as normal as the next person. Suggest that the Enemy made him to have homosexual attractions and therefore he is normal because he is acting in sync with the way he was made. By such suggestions, you can calm the voice of conscience in him and prepare him for the next step - that of becoming a vocal and belligerant supporter of abnormal sexual behavior. 

 

5. In the current round of sexual nuttiness now looping around Washington DC, we have found  and isolated those who have greatly sympathetic hearts for their fellow man. We push them to feel it is "unfair"  to think you are a woman and not be able to use women's bathroom. People who have such deep degrees of sympathetic reaction to percieved injustices are unable to think rationally. It is impossible to tell them that reality is determined by what is real, not by how a person fantasizes. We have used the emotions of people to counteract their ability for rational thought. And for the great majority of them, it is because at one time in their lives, they experimented with drugs and opened the door to us for their possession.

 

6. Always whisper. When we began our possession of the polticians in the world, we learned that you must be circumspect with what you suggest. We had a tribal chief lined up for some very good work, but an impatient first-year tempter gave him a sudden and intemperate suggestion to kill all his enemies, cut their heads off, and stick them on poles. In a moment of reflection, the chief somehow realized what he was becoming and repented of his planned revenge. The violence of that sudden suggestion overrode his enmity against his enemies and brought him back to his senses. He wound up making a peace treaty - ugh! utterly disgusting - that lasted over 300 years between those two tribes. It took over thirty years to make Vlad the Impaler do what he did to his Muslim enemies. You don't create a man like that overnight, and certainly not by screaming obscenities into his soul about his impaling enemies on the first day of his possession.

 

7. The final part - patience. Remember, you have all the time in....well, forever. You will exist eternally, these mudbugs will not. There is plenty of time with which to work with them. Each small suggestion, carefully whispered to the soul which has turned its back to the Enemy, will bring the door open a little more, until that glorious day you will be able to slide in unnoticed and begin your work.

 

The little blue ball upon which these insects live is one the verge of blowing itself apart. The reason is simple: we own almost all of the polticians. We have blown their egos up so big that they cannot think of cooperating with each other. Armed to the teeth, building war toys at a breathtaking pace, toying with nuclear arms - they are so close to destroying everything that some days I can hardly stand the suspense of waiting for the first one of them to push the red button and end this mad experiment of our Enemy's once and for all.

 

Well, that is my final word to you before graduation. You have done well, and I have a surprise for you. You are to be awarded First Darkness at the commencement. Just remember, with promotion comes responsibility.  Do not disappoint the trust I have placed in you by my recommendation to the Board of Tempters General.

 

Cordially for the damnation of humans,

 

 

Infernus, the Magnificent